Would you like to critique a thirteen year old girl poem?
So expect a face from the light wood with a twirl on her chin Risen Needle toes. A broken doll with shattered skin as she dances with a pose painful. A lily white sky of perfect hands Did carve her silk Thighs of oak. A perfect figure, the day lights up lands, to wrap it in a paper jacket. So sweet and small, the ticking of melody, The measurement of her quiet heart. The heart, embracing a fallen moon, piercing the earth vanished art. to stretch your neck and long for light, slim and a spy of the leather stars. Finger in her wet Sleeve closely so they tear throw her wooden scars. A mouth-watering sugar drink sun to leave the watching eyes to tears. can run your narrow heel, that not, they hear the melody with pointed ears. The image should take it, is a wooden ballerina in a music box. do not know what makes you think but please tell Me!
14-year-old boy the answer – I thought it was beautiful. I ran into him as I am finished off a poetry analysis at the moment for my course work and I was looking for an online help. This was really refreshing and I do not know – makes you think. I loved the contrast in the beginning – "split skin," constitute "pain." It creates a sense of surrealism – The world of the doll as it seems, but it is filled with longing and desolation. The "Lily White Sky" is used, to describe the "good hands" is so illustrious – you get a fantastic picture and using the metaphor of the doll maker hands as an extension of "Heaven" of the doll of the world is simply breathtaking. Maybe because you are still, technically, a developing individual (one student). Hey, it does not let it drag you down – I get it all the time: D My Brother's read it and also he is, I think, more poetic than I am, and he proposes to assign You leave your last stanza of this – Watching eyes to tears A sugar soaked mouth to drink the sun – you hear the melody with pointed ears and narrow heel run that can not. BTW I am doing this theatrical Prince conceived on the basis of "the boy" by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, and this is such a wonderful companion. 
This is really bad cos I'm usually does a poem by a poet who probably died a few centuries ago. But now it's really you. Well Done!
Creating a mixed media, altered art, flower fairy paper art doll.
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